Vibrations

Last night I was flooded with the absolute knowing that at my core I am a vibration.

My energetic sickness was peaking in its intensity and I was beginning to feel trapped. I knew that this was not the wisest thought pattern to grab on to because once we start feeling like a victim there is no telling how deep we might spiral in to oblivion.

Instead, I sat myself down on my yoga mat and did 1 hour of a Surrendering Yin Yoga class and then crawled in to bed to go as deep as possible in to my inner being. After about 5 minutes of complete surrender my eyes started quivering and burning because of all the energy that was being dislodged.

After 10 minutes I forgot that I was in a meditation and if you are a seasoned meditator you know that this is when a shift starts taking place. I began feeling wave after wave of energetic vibration wash through me. I was really starting to know myself as these vibrations. The mind felt as if it was an illusion. I started feeling that all of its attachments and positionalities were also illusions much like our societies egoic structure. None of it is real so why am I suffering as if it is?

20 minutes later I began vibrating in a place outside of my body. My instinct was to become fearful. I initially thought, “holy shit, where am I going? I’m not sure if this is a good idea. Will I come back?”

After a moment of examination I realized these worries were all unfounded and coming from that very convincing illusionist known as my mind. For the remainder of my meditation I just floated in this pure energetic and non-physical state. The intensely painful vibrations that had been ripping me apart were still there but I wasn’t involved in the drama of them anymore.

I was in a place of innocent and peaceful observation. That’s when it dawned on me; this is who I am! I am not the pain, attachments, positionalities, personality or anything belonging to this physical realm. I am temporarily in this world but I’m not of this world. This body, mind and personality don’t belong to me they belong to Mother Gaia. The vibrations within is who ‘I am’. It is who we all are.

When I find a way to listen to things I’m not like my fears and doubts my higher-self inundates me with a tremendous amount of pain as if to say, “Did you forget? You’re here to create the world you want to live in not to live in the old world full or fear and compromises. You are infinite intelligence.

This planet needs you to be who you came to be. If you insist on living in your old patterns it is going to become more painful than you could ever imagine. The only way to find peace is for you to let go, let go, let go.”